T&Cs

What if the most potent rebellion is not to post anything?

I wake up at 8, eat a big bowl of honey toast crunch and drink hot chocolate while watching the Witcher. Then I hit the couch and play my way through the morning. I mine coin then take the afternoon off and fuck the latest Fembot that arrived last night.

I’m a voluntary incel. Last Easter, anyone who got their tubes tied got free entry into Delirium – the latest, greatest Megaverse verse. And now my life is perfect. All my bills are paid for. Delicious vegan meals are delivered by a caterer drone after my concierge bot wakes me up with a mix of 525 Hz chillstep and squirts of cortisol. I live in a box in a tower in a block in a grid one billion squares deep.

Sign-up Day was beautiful. The sun shone through the smog and I held your hand. All the fights, the tears, all the words used to wound were forgotten and we both wished for more time, just one more second together on this beautiful Earth.

But I’d agreed to their terms and conditions too many times to turn back. The hardest thing I ever did was stepping onto that helo-drone and into the Company’s loving embrace, but I’ve never regretted it and I hope you don’t too.